Me with Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds...

         ...Can’t sleep tonight. Don’t know why. It’s really so strange! Usually I go to bed at about 2:30am and become damn unconscious within 3:00. Then wake up at 7:30 and gotta rush to freaky classes at sharp 8:15. So the 4:30 hours of my sleep-time, I sleep a baby-sleep or probably babies even don’t sleep that well. But tonight was different. I still don’t know the reason. After all, my daily routine was just like another ordinary day.
As usual after smoking my day’s last cigarette I went to my hostel-bed which is more like a hospital bed, one broken leg of which is substituted by a chair somehow. I closed my eyes, made the everyday promise, which I break every next day, that I’d reduce smoking. Well whatever, I closed my eyes, I was dog-tired as usual, but somehow there wasn’t no sign of sleep-fairy. I was still trying to call her but I failed time and again. At last when it was about 3:20 I couldn’t lay down any more. I went to bathroom and then had some cold water. I was about to fall into my bed again, but something restrained me. I dragged out my old diary, took a pen, grabbed an extra-day cigarette and stepped out of my room-102. I went to the hostel-roof. Giant halogen lights seemed to piss me off. Otherwise I’d have enjoyed my standing alone under the dark night with millions of twinkling stars. Whatever, there’s always a gap between what you want and what you get. I accepted my fate, lit up my cigarette and started to think about something. I ogled at distant bright flame of farness of steel factories for some moments. Then in an unmindful mood I changed my vision towards a very tiny star, then all of a sudden started dreaming about some unknown absentminded smile and Lucy was all over my head amidst the sky studded with diamonds. And the only thing that was tuning its tune in the guitar of my brain was those lines,
“She’s the queen,
 Without a king,
 Playing guitar-
 Cries and sing…”

Slowly I turned the pages of my diary and stopped in a random blank page and started scratching lines with my pen on it...


        ...I was so damn whimsical at this time that after completion of my painting I understood that I was drawing that absentminded Lucy. After a few moments of silence I found that Lucy started singing in my ear,
“Blackbird singing
 In the dead of night
 Take these broken wings
 And learn to fly,
 All your life
 You were only waiting
 For this moment to arise,
 Blackbird fly,
 Blackbird fly
 Into the night of the dark black night…”
 
  That’s really the dream, Lucy was whispering into my ear, I always was waiting for in my damn life. I always wanted to break out of everything and fly to the unknown, be the next to be Lucy in the sky with diamonds. I thought that it’s the right moment I’ve been longing for so long. I let my spirit free and from a caterpillar it transformed to a butterfly of black and flied up and up and up and…….. suddenly I realized that it wasn’t caterpillar or butterfly, instead the caged black bird that I had been for so long, broke the cage and flew free into the deepest sea, the endless vast hollow starry sky. Flying high and high me, the blackbird lost in the dark of the deep night and after blindly flying for some time I saw a bright light and found myself right beside Lucy amidst the diamonds.
Every complicated thing of life seemed so easy to me. I felt like I’d answer of all damn questions, I felt like I was wandering across the universe. I felt as if,
“Words are flowing out
Like endless rain into a paper cup,
They slither while they pass
They slip away
Across the universe,
Pools of sorrow, waves of joy
Are drifting through my open mind,
Possessing and caressing me…”

 While I was in this tour way across the universe, suddenly I found I lost Lucy somewhere. I tried to find her but she wasn’t no where in the sight. I flied here and there looking for any clue of her but all was in vain. I tried to give some hope to myself, I started singing,
“Hey Jude,
 Don’t make it bad,
 Take a sad song
 And make it better,
 Remember to let her
 Into your heart,
 Then you can start
 To make it better…”

    ...Then I asked myself who’s this Lucy anyway? Is she any specific human or any hypothetical woman of my mind, or is she my pen, my words, or my best friend, my cigarette or is she just an idea? Or may be she’s me myself like the lyrics,
“I’m he
 As you’re he
 As you’re me
 And we’re all together…”

Oh damn! It’s 7:15 now. I can’t understand how time slipped through my hand. A full sleepless night! But I really gotta go now. By the way I still search who’s this Lucy? If you got the answer please let me know who’s the Lucy in the sky with diamonds…

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